Want to be treated differently by someone? Then change YOUR behaviors and you stand a better chance. It took this keynote speaker many years to understand that every day in every way, through our words and actions, we teach others – including our pets – how to treat us.
I recently read a story that illustrated this perfectly – and cracked me up. Seems a woman had a problem with her dog biting. He would actually corner her in a room, snarl and sometimes bite. How did she deal with this behavior? She would throw food at the dog to get him away from her. Yep, that’s right — whenever her pet threatened to attack her, she would give him a snack. She went on to tell her vet that she HAD to keep snacks in every room of the house now!
It would be even funnier if this behavior truth didn’t cause so many of us pain in the process. In my single days I can remember putting up with men who said they would change, but didn’t. And here’s why: I took them back no matter what.
After programs, I listen to individuals who have issues with how their supervisors take advantage of their time and energy. Why does this continue to happen? Because these same individuals haven’t had a healthy, assertive conversation with their supervisor or created any boundaries. Instead they take it and get the work done, which only reinforces his tactics.
We’ve all seen the parent in the store who after five minutes of listening to their kid scream for something they want, gives in. I get it, you’re exhausted, perhaps embarrassed, BUT you just taught that kid to scream for a minimum of five minutes next time.
What am I saying? Before complaining or becoming upset with someone over their behavior, get honest about what you’re teaching. Perhaps it’s time to choose another course and speak your truth.